What I realized the other day, as I talked through increasing panic attacks with one of our participants, is the reality that I, too, am anxious. I, too, am confused about the ironies of enjoying more time with my children, while at the same time, front line workers are risking their lives every day, unable to stay home and care for their own families.
The acknowledgment of this shared crisis and the toll it is taking on our mental health is vital right now. It is important to be able to stop, breathe and acknowledge—this is NOT normal.
I miss seeing my sisters and my parents. I open videos and photos of my 8-month-old niece with a mixture of joy and sadness so intense that it takes me a moment to identify the feelings.
And yet, we all are asked to cope with this. We need to find not just our individual resilience, but a community resilience as well.
There are signs of it—the Mask Makers Guild, rainbows in windows, clapping and noise in the evening for essential workers. For some of us, these actions help us feel more connected and better. For others, even this may feel overwhelming during these times.
It also gives us no choice but to sit in the stillness and silence, and be uncomfortable in these anxious feelings. In our society, we are not comfortable with that. With the quiet. With the stillness.
There is much that we can learn from those in recovery. Taking things day-by-day, and even moment-by-moment. Acknowledging our powerlessness in this situation.
As we continue towards this ‘new normal’, and our town begins to slowly work out what this next phase will look like, let us not forget the feelings of togetherness, gratitude and also of quiet that we are finding.
A single hour can have me, simultaneously, in awe at the amount of family time we’ve been allowed to catch up on game nights and Harry Potter movies. And then the next, the short-temper I catch myself having with my boys due to the utter lack of time alone.
People are struggling right now. Hub participants have a higher-level needs. l have worked to assist a woman in recovery leave an abusive relationship. Another participant values the weekly check-ins that help re-set and keep something steady on their schedules.
Please reach out with your stories, concerns and yes, complaints. It’s important we acknowledge how very hard this is. And that our ability to cope varies as widely as our situations.
And figure out ways to connect as a community through it all.
Danielle Pack McCarthy
April 2020